In every project that I do on a deadline, I hit what I think of as the "75% Point of Despair." It's the time I get close to the end of the project, close enough that I can start to taste what it will feel like to be done but with the finish line far enough away that I despair I will ever reach it.
The worst part is the certainty that the project I happen to be in the midst of is the biggest pile of crap ever knat upon. Every unevenness in tension starts to alarm me (should I have gone back and redone that part of the waistband?), even little inconsistencies that the rational side of me knows will block out (that little voice whispers insistently: but what if they don't?!). I start thinking of all the other ways I could have done it -- a different edging, a contrast color, a new stitch pattern. It looks too plain, or too tarted up. I am convinced my gauge has been thrown off no matter how often I measure it (it's hard to make progress when you check gauge five times per row). I think of the stuff I see in books or magazines or on Ravelry -- a Norah Gaughan here, an Eunny Jang there -- and shudder at the thought of my crappy project just a click away from those masterpieces. I look at it, its unblocked, sad mass of stitches cowering meekly under my scowl, and know that I just don't have enough time to redo it, even if my dissatisfaction were rational and I could figure out its source.
I'm around that point now, and I'm working with someone whose work I have long loved and who could make a paper hat folded from newspaper look like Chanel's best creation. (No pressure there.)
So I'm very happy that I will be greeting someone special at the airport tomorrow,
in time for a meet-and-greet Friday evening and a lace class Saturday at Loop. The 75% Point of Despair hardly ever lasts, but even if it tried, how could one possibly stay mired in the depths of despair when Franklin's coming?
oh. mygod. i feel EXACTLY the same way, often/even when i'm knitting from someone else's pattern! (should have modded that waist shaping, used a different cast-on, EWW what is up with my tension?!!!)
ReplyDeletelove the franklin piccy!
I am so disappointed that I cannot come tomorrow night :( I could use a good giggle this week.
ReplyDeleteI think we all reach the point of self doubt on every project - design, or straight knit - especially around the 3/4 point. It just goes on that long... but your work is always gorgeous and I'm sure this one will be too - love the photo, have fun!
ReplyDeleteI would normally say that Franklin needs no tarting up whatsoever- but that has to be the best picture!
ReplyDeleteGo to bed- tomorrow morning when you see the beautiful sweater you are making, you'll wonder why you even had any doubts. Its gonna be incredible- I know this.
I thought that I was the only one, but for me it is 80%! At 80% the urge to start a new project becomes overwhelming....
ReplyDeleteLove your Franklin picture!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad I found your blog! I totally agree, often I work on something for so long, I can't even tell if it even looks good anymore or if it was a stupid idea to begin with. Thanks for sharing, Blingee is boss.
ReplyDeleteIt will be fine! I love love love your stuff. Here's hoping it's already blown over. Have a great time with Franklin!
ReplyDelete*snickers* You know you're BFF when you can tart him up like a Pretty Pretty Princess devotee and walk away with no hard feelings. Seriously one of the BEST friend gags I've seen in a while. :)
ReplyDeleteUgh, that TOTALLY happens to me too! It's so comforting to know that I'm not alone -- because it's happening to me right now with my current project. Halfway through the hood of a baby Tomten, no sleeves yet, and the whole thing just looks like a pile of arse to me. I must believe this too shall pass.
ReplyDeletehe is even sexier in person..take it from me, ladies (and gentlemen)! w00f! w00f!
ReplyDeleteIt is such a comfort that you have the 75% thing! I am looking a sock right now and wondering what the hell I was thinking.
ReplyDeleteLots of envy on the visit.
Oh Thank You! Not that I want anyone else to feel that moment of despair, but you expressed it so well.
ReplyDeleteAlso thank you for the Franklin (and Delores). I'm considering the "set as background" option.