
Partial transcript follows (maternal profanity sanitized for your protection):
M.T.: Mom, when I can I do it?
Me: I have to show you what to do, or else how will you know what to do?
M.T.: Hurry up.
Me (demonstrating): See how it goes in, around, through and off?
M.T.: In, around, through and off. I KNOW, Mommy.
Me: Okay, give it a try. In, aro---
M.T.: I KNOW. Through and OFF! Do you think I'm dumb, Mommy?
15 minutes later.
M.T.: MOMMY! Why is this so tight?
Me: Let me take a look.
M.T.: Why did you give me knitting with extra-tight stitches? Did you purposely make them tight so I couldn't do it?
Me: Don't be silly. [Fixes knitting and goes to visit bathroom]
3 minutes later.
M.T. [at the top of her lungs]: MOMMY! MOMMY! I NEED YOU! MOMMY!!!
Me (rushing downstairs half-clothed, ready to call 911): What?! Are you okay?
M.T.: I need you to help me with my knitting. There are too many loops.
Each one, teach one, so the teached one, can kvetch some...