Me: [grumble grumble grumble]
Husband: What are you doing?
Me: [muffled voice coming from closet] Looking for some yarn.
Husband: Hah. Well (gesturing everywhere around him to yarn in baskets, on tables, covering nearly every surface) I can see why you're having trouble.
Me: Not helpful.
Husband: Is there any in that basket? [pointing to basket full of sock yarn]
Me: No, that's sock yarn. I'm looking for something bulkier.
Husband: What about this? [holds up leftover ball of Rowan Big Wool] This is bulky.
Me: But it's not NORO.
Me: You know, the one with all the colors? that stripes?
Husband: There's a whole bin of colored yarn over here.
Me: No, that's not it either. I'm looking for a specific ball of Noro. I know I have a leftover ball of Big Kureyon somewhere and I need it to swatch with.
Husband: Can't you just use something else?
Me: [loud sigh]
It can be tough for someone who isn't totally immersed in yarn to understand that not all yarn is fungible. If I'm looking for a really thick yarn that has tweedy tufts and changes color every fifty yards, then a really skinny sock yarn in a solid color just won't do it. If I am trying to swatch for a call for submissions for a summer magazine issue, then swatching in a mohair/angora/alpaca blend is going to look silly. If I am thinking about playing around with some colorwork, then I need solid yarns in a relatively lightweight gauge, not barberpole-marled roving with a black thread binder.
So please don't get all "We live in a yarn museum with every fiber known to humandkind, so how can you not find any yarn?" on me, honey, because all yarn isn't made alike and I NEED BULKY WEIGHT AND WORSTED ISN"T THICK ENOUGH, SELF-STRIPING BUT IN LONG COLORWAYS NOT SHORT REPEATS, PREFERABLY IN BRIGHT COLORWAYS NOT MUTED ONES, IDEALLY BY NORO, YARN.
Now help me move those 15 bins of yarn so I can see what's in the back of the closet, 'kay?